Yesterday was a disaster.
My drawing for Day 08 started out alright, but I really over-worked the painting and ended up with a mess. At about 11:00 at night I started over and ended up posting something much closer to my original idea.
Looking back, I realize that by the time I’d thought “maybe I should start again”, it was already too late. But I went on, wasting an hour and a half.
When I started the second version, I enjoyed it so much more. I went in with confidence and a loose energy that I wish I’d had for the first piece.
Why did it take me so long to admit that the first piece was a dud? Why, after a week, was it still so hard to start off with confidence? Why did seven days of practice make it more difficult, and not easier?
Day 10 means we are one third of the way through this Thirty Days Project. I’m trying to maintain a style that requires both abandon and control, freedom and restraint. The internal struggle gets more and more familiar each day, and I’m trying to love that, to get as much joy out of the struggle as I do from a satisfactory piece.
How do you feel on Day 10? What are you thinking about the next 20 days?